based on the communication of love between the
man and a woman. Whose job is it to propose,
We asked some members of the
public
*It makes men inferior if women do it - Popoola Damilola
From my point of view, the man should be the one to
propose, not the woman because according to the
Bible, God created man before the woman. The
women, therefore, should not take the place of men.
The man is the head of the family, and so he should
start to practise his headship right before the
relationship or marriage begins. It makes us less as
men if women should begin to lead where we are
supposed to.
*It’s the man’s calling - Ajao Agnes
Ideally, there should be no argument about who
should propose because love is a matter of the heart.
If there is love and understanding, then it should not
matter who proposes. But looking at some
underlying factors, I feel a man should be the one to
because even in terms of religion, that is the way
God ordained it to be. Moreover, the Nigerian culture
prohibits women from proposing because people feel
it does not dignify womanhood; hence, it’s seen as a
man’s responsibility. Morally, I feel it is wrong.
Every woman should have a sense of self worth and
dignity; and so, proposing to a man might make a
woman look cheap and desperate for marriage.
*Men should run after women - Blessing Adanma
Culturally, it is not ideal for a woman to propose and
that is the same in every tribe. Biblically, it is written
that he who finds a good wife finds favour in the
eyes of God. So, it is the duty of the man to find and
propose. Socially, ladies are designed to pose for
guys to woo. Men should be the ones running after
the women. I see it as an act of desperation when
women propose to men. If they are good looking
enough and intelligent, men would propose to them.
That’s their job.
*Women are sometimes constrained - Timileyin
A man should be the one to propose to his woman.
However, in recent times, the men do not seem ready
until they have acquired what they call ‘treasures’ or
attain certain heights; hence, the lady would have to
wait until he accomplishes some or all of his
dreams. This situation might amount to a waste of
time for the woman, which could lead to frustration,
and might eventually compel her to propose. I think
if the man is taking too long, the woman can just
stylishly seek his opinion to know where the
relationship is headed so that she will not have to
wait forever. But I prefer that the man proposes so as
to boost his ego.
*Women could also do it - Tolulope Lucy
It is normal for men to propose, but it all depends on
our exposure because personally, I don’t see
anything wrong if a woman likes a man and tells
him so. Also, some men are shy and not properly
exposed due to their background, so it may be
helpful to them if women do the proposal.
Furthermore, things are changing now and so it
doesn’t matter who proposes as long as they both
know they love each other. If a man is not crude, he
would see nothing wrong in a lady proposing to
him.
* A woman can, but with caution - Joseph Adeoye
I think either of them can propose. After all, during
creation, emotions did not have male and female
versions. Since both of them could be in love, either
of them should also do the talking. Though, in this
part of the world, if a woman proposes, it could
affect her self-esteem because it is not seen as an
ideal thing to do. However, if the woman is sure that
the man loves her and he’s taking forever, she
should go ahead and propose – with caution,
though, so that she doesn’t appear desperate. If, by
virtue of that, the man reduces his respect for her,
then it means the relationship is not worth it.
*It is the man’s responsibility - Mr. Joshua Akindele
A man should propose because it is the normal
thing to do. I find it awkward when women take
over men’s responsibilities. A man should first of all
have interest in a woman and then communicate
that interest to the woman via proposal. If she
accepts, it shows they both have interest in each
other. The man should know what he wants in his
life and the woman should decide if she wants the
man. The man proposes; the woman either rejects
or accepts. That’s the ideal thing.
*A man is better placed to do it - C. A. Jacobs
A man should propose to the woman. Usually,
women are moved by emotions while men are moved
by reason; and since a home cannot be built on
emotions, the woman should avoid being driven by
her emotions in proposing to the man. These days,
men and women are competing for equality, but that
doesn’t give room for the woman to assume certain
responsibilities. However, I feel the man tends to
lose some dignity and self worth if the woman
proposes. There are however better ways a woman
can show the man how much she loves him than
being the one to propose. Nevertheless, it’s better
done by the man.
* The cap fits the me - CEO Dopeboizmuzik
A man should propose, because his responsibility as
the head of the home starts from having the courage
to take certain decisions. If a man loves a woman,
he should be bold to ask her out. Once the two of
them are in love, it is often left for the man to talk. A
woman doesn’t marry a man, rather, a man does.
Even if the girl asks the man out, the man may say
no, which may not go down well with her; so it’s a
man’s responsibility. In fact, a woman has no
reason to do that. A woman could also propose, but
it’s better if done by the man.
*Either of them can do it - Jacobs Aderonke Jane
It depends on the relationship. Either men or
women can be in love, so the person in love should
feel free to do the talking. But it’s understandable
that women don’t propose in this part of the world
because the men make them look cheap and
promiscuous, which is a false and unrealistic belief.
Personally, I can’t do it because I will be shy, unless
impliedly and by way of disposition, but I can’t do
that expressly. Usually, when women propose, men
do take such women for granted, except the man
loves the lady; otherwise, men would naturally take
advantage of that. I feel men who are lucky to be
approached by women should appreciate and guard
such gestures jealously.
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